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Columns

Col. Paul M.A. Linebarger

Americans You Should Know Cover.

Ian Mcleod, of http://ianmcleod.blogspot.com/, lends his skills to let you know about a controversial American, you should know.

Made Of Honor

Made of Honor: a film

I’m trying to remember Jeff Large and the CDs he might have left behind when he left Los Angeles. Jeff had a few prize possessions, one of which was the William Burroughs/Kurt Cobain CD “The Priest They Called Him”; which was not nearly as rare as Jeff would have us believe –though it might be rare now. Apparently the CD was recorded with Burroughs reading at one sitting and Kurt playing at a different one. The two performers never met.

I knew I didn’t put enough money in the parking meter and I impetuously attacked the meter maid when we returned to the car and found him putting a ticket under the windshield wiper. I was arrested. Troy drove the car back to my parents’ house (it’s there car) and took a nap on my futon.

Bob Dobbs

Americans You Should Know Cover.

Bob is our Jesus. Dobbs is our Hope, Jesus is our Bob Hope

Hunter S. Thompson

Americans You Should Know Cover.

Hunter S. Thompson was born and raised in KT, which makes him American. His words on page make him one you should know.

Dear Jane, Letters to Jane

Dear Jane,
I am the proud parent of a two daughters. I also have a friend “Noel” who I have known for 15 years. Lately, Noel has become a little too friendly toward our 18-year-old, “Bambi.” He gives Bambi money for doing nothing. The first time, he gave her $400 and told her not to tell my wife or me. Of course, our she told her parents anyway. We raise our girls right. When we confronted Noel, he said he felt sorry for Bambi and she was supposed to pay back the loan, so we let her to keep the money to buy clothes.

A few weeks after that, Noel gave Bambi $200 for locks of her long blond hair, so he could sell them over the Internets. Needless to say, her mother and I were very upset. But instead of confronting him again, we gave Noel the cold shoulder, and hoped he would get the message.

About a month later, he sneaked into our home and installed a satellite box in Bambi’s room. When we discovered the box, we asked Bambi where it came from, and she said Noel. The box had been rigged with free pay and pornography channels. We removed the box, gave it back to our ex-friend and ordered him never to come around our kids again. Do you think we did enough?
~Guarding in Glendale

Read Jane’s Advice

Dear Jane,

Hello to all my adoring fans,

Jane is back and I am here to help the people. From love notes to questions, I get letters all the time. Everyone seems to want to know some bit of knowledge from the queen of brand labels.

Before, I tried to answer every mail and would sit in my local Starbucks to rattle off my sage-like advice with a mocha in hand. However, I only helped one person and knew I knew I could do more. I could answer the letters, drink the mocha, and post them on American NonFicition.

I can help the world and not get dirty in the peace core. I call that win-win…

Get Jane’s Advice

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