Food Review of L.A.’s Westside -on the cheap

“Don’t call it a comeback” is a pretty cheap intro, but it’s still good for a laugh to me and it suits my theme…cheap thrills!

I know it’s been awhile since my last post, but life has been busy. Busy in a boring but pleasant enough way, but nothing news- worthy. Aside from that, it’s been hard to maintain my foodie status since I’ve been trying to lose the weight I gained while binge-everything in New Orleans last July.

 I’m eating celery salad and Subway veggie subs. I’m drinking Crystal Light to stay up on water intake and doing diet mixers with my cocktails. It’s practically criminal. My morbidly obese inner child is throwing tantrums left and right. Ah, the halcyon days of summer. Anybody hungry for…

Westside Yummies on the Cheap

Best Indian Dinner Deal:

Hands down, the weekly “free feast” at the Hare Krishna center on Venice Blvd at Watseka.  Sure, it’s vegetarian and you might get hit with more free literature than you’d like, but these people are cooking with god-given inspiration and the traditional dishes are refined based on centuries of development.  India Sweet and Spices is also a good buy, though the minimalist and somewhat dismal seating make it a better choice for take-out…unless you’re homeless.

Best Chinese Food Outside of Chinatown

Hands down, Hu’s in Palms. Order anything, but you can’t go wrong with the double-cooked pork dinner special…unless you’re a vegetarian, in which case they have plenty of other options. The atmosphere is boring and has remained largely unchanged over the years, and there’s a reason for that. The food is so solidly good that the place is an F’in gold-mine. Why change a cash cow if it’s just an expense? Don’t want to go for the bland atmosphere? They deliver. Sure, there’s a bunch of Chinese places around, but after Hu’s you’ll realize (if you didn’t know already) Chinese isn’t just Chinese.

Mexican Combination Plates, Low Deniro

Honestly, the geography and cultural climate of our area makes that pretty easy. But on a fascinating first note, may I ask what the hell is the deal with Tito’s Tacos? I do not understand why people queue up at this Culver City staple like it was Pink’s, and it’s not like I haven’t tried it several times. 

The atmosphere is horrible. First and foremost, there’s the constant noise and fumes of the adjacent 405 overpass and Sepulveda Blvd., which doesn’t pair well with the mostly outdoor or open-window-un-air-conditioned indoor seating options. On top of that, the tables are rarely wiped down. The tacos hit my stomach like lead. The guacamole is watery, which I now understand is regionally customary in some parts of Mexico, but I can tell you that me and some of my friends think it’s disgusting, no offense. Maybe it’s the economy of the thing that bears Tito’s it’s success, because they do include free chips and salsa, but the chips get stale fast and the salsa is nothing to write home about. 

In any case, if you give into curiosity and hit that long, hot, stinky line at Tito’s, I’ve got two words for you; TAKE OUT. Or more to the point, GOOD LUCK. I guess it just pays to advertise. Am I the only one who is haunted by the Tito’s theme song that blares from my cable box ten times a day or more? Curse you, Warner Cable local advertising salesman!

“I love Tito’s Ta-cos. You love Tito’s, too.”

No, I fucking don’t. I prefer Cinco De Mayo, which is right next to Tito’s and is open 24 hours without the long lines and a little less 405 noise and fume pollution. It’s no palace, but it’s a step in the right direction. For a sit-down meal at similarly frugal prices, I vouch for Don Chuy’s, which remains open at their original location despite getting hammered by the economy and having to close their 2nd location.

By the way, Don Chuy is a real guy.  He’s the owner and he hangs out there and he won’t be offended if you ask if the young stud on the menu cover is really him (it is). Paco’s? Overrated and over-priced. El Cholo at any of it’s locations? A step up from El Torrito (though the Marina one has a great view), but more the kind of place you can take your conservative parents rather than going out with our “on the cheap” theme….unless you get them to pay, and you know I know how to work those alligator arms!  Moving on…

Italian Pasta Pie, Anyone?

Now, if you have a few bucks and want a nice dinner, impress your date with Vito on Ocean Park….classy!  Villa Italian on Sepulveda for Itlaliano on the cheap?  Nice people, good prices…but sorry, crap food.  Go to Pasta Factory’s sister store, Alejo for $-$$ (no booze on hand, but also no corkage fee).

You might run into Perry Farrell and his lovely lady at El Alejo, which should clue you in that this hole in the wall on Lincoln is better than it looks. Looking for Italian on the cheap that isn’t spectacular, but has nice atmosphere and “good enough” food that comes in portions that will keep you fed for days? Try C & O Cucina and I guarantee nobody in your party will go hungry.

But if we’re talking pizza and cured Italian meat and cheese sandwiches, to go or possibly delivered, Victor Jr’s Culver City rocks my world (despite a boring name), and apparently it also rocks the world of the crews working on the Sony lot, because they make enough on the day shift that they close damn early at night for a pizza/delivery place.  

LaRocco’s Pizzeria also places well for westside pie. Unfortunately, neither of these places hits hard in the truly “cheap” category. Such is the battle of quality vs. cost.  I’ve heard good and bad things about The Slice in Santa Monica and haven’t tried it myself so I can’t fully endorse it for flavor, but I hear the deal on slices is sweet among generally expensive Santa Monica shops.

 I can tell you from (too much) personal experience that The Coop, hidden on Exposition in Palms, has a pretty good pie for the cost….take-out only, but always a pleasant staff in my experience.  Some people like the bagel dough at Abbott’s, but I find it to be a heavy and a smarmy substitute for real-deal authentic Italian pizza crust, which should have have a nice crunch to the crust and an airy but decadently tasty inside.

And unfortunately, like Victor’s and La Rocca Pizzeria, Abbott’s doesn’t score that strong on price. I wish I could say Piece o’ Pizza was better because they are cheap and somehow they remain open year after year despite being maybe the most depressing and overbearingly hot dining room in town, but they are barely better than the “Mexican-style” pizza places around town, which are all super cheap, but also super disappointing to the authentic Pizza patron.

Cheap Japanese Sushi Spots?

 
This may look like a trick question, but yes, it is possible. Sure, there’s many great fine-dining sushi places in West Los Angeles, but let’s get those alligator arms clapping for some of the cheaper contenders. 

 Here’s some do’s and dont’s. DO check out the Mitsuwa Asian superstore’s food court. There’s a reason you can’t find parking in the lot they share with CVS, and trust me, it’s not the scene at CVS. For a killer deal, DO Otom Sushi‘s all you can eat nights.  This place has been hit hard by the recession and competition, but it was recently renovated (looking better for it) and is still not a bad spot for the buck.  

DO the nicely-priced Chilean Sea Bass entrée at Fuji Wok, but don’t get wrapped up in the expensive rolls there. You can get better rolls for the same price at fancier sushi places. As for their Sea Bass, it might be falsely titled, but even if it’s cod it’s still a great deal and damn tasty. DON’T do Yokohoma Sushi in the black hole that is Culver Center (Bally’s, Best Buy, Radio Shack, Kragen Auto Parts….uh, and sushi?  Yuck). Cheap, but mediocre at best and one of the worst dining experiences of my life at the worst.  Talk about Crab with a K.  

If you’re stuck in that area, DO Sushi Karen, which is a bit drab and industrial, but is reasonable and tasty.  If you live in the heart of “West Los Angeles”, you already know it’s basically Little Tokyo West, so DO keep an eye out for specials in any of the several great Sushi spots. Don’t be afraid to ask questions despite possible language barriers!  It will pay back exponential dividends in delicious deals and newly founded friendships.

DIY Best Foodie value for the buck?

 
FM isn’t just radio jargon. Shame on you if you haven’t at least checked out your local Farmer’s Market. Sure, the official FM in Fairfax at the Grove is an obvious pick, but Santa Monica’s is great, too. The Mar Vista Farmer’s Market is booming and expanding every Sunday, and unlike Santa Monica’s, nobody has reamed a bloody vehicle through it (yet).  Last time I went, not only did I get some great product, but thanks to some corporate sponsors I also got free (full bottle) Snapple samples and free seeds to grow everything from Beans to Basil.

 If you haven’t been, you should also know that it’s not just fruits and veggies at the FM.  You can score reasonable deals on specialty cheeses, fish and meats on ice, baked goods, an awesome “any 3 items for $10″ deal at Baba’s mediterranean stand, and PLENTY of finger-lickin’ good hot and cold street food. For the most frugal of gourmets, just wander through and fill up on those free samples! But if you save the toothpicks for later use at your next cocktail party, you just might be a little too cheap, even for me.

Not into DIY, but curious about the FM concept and how it fits into your hipper-than-thou pan-global American Non-Kitchen scene? This is Mar Freakin’ Vista baby, so the FM street food isn’t just BBQ and corn on a stick. Oh, don’t get me wrong, there will be all-American BBQ and fresh lemonade, hand-squeezed before your very eyes, and it will be good. However, authentic French Crepes and pastries, Argentine Empanada’s, Mexican Tamales, Peruvian juices….even Chinese Dim Sum is on the line.

 It’s like the food court at Epcot, except it’s good.  Bonus:  Dog-sitting service while you shop paid by donation.  Double Bonus:  get a fly cut at the new Floyd’s on the corner, which is a wonderful improvement from the previous storefront there, which was a porno DVD superstore.  On the other hand, there’s nothing wrong with a good porno and that superstore did have some great deals at the going out of business sale, which at least lines up with my “on the cheap” theme…but I digress.

Eat Classy, Los Angeles.  Bon Apetit!