Banking Extortion

I got up today with the task of collecting all my checks around the city, cashing them, and then giving the money to my landlord.

The first part of the mission went flawlessly and by 1 PM I had a hand full of checks. However, the real trouble began when I when I got to the bank teller who informed me that without a membership in the bank I had no hope of cashing the full amount and would be subjected to a 5 dollar non customer fee.

This mystified me. I had a check, written by a member of the bank, linked to an account in the bank, but I was helpless against a 5 dollar fee for not banking through them. So in a laymen’s terms, this means that if I am an employer and have a business account, my employees have to spend half an hour worth of work to pay the bank fees on their hard earned cash.

Even if you are paid 20 bucks an hour, that is still 25% of an hour and what do you get for this fee? The bank lets you enter their lobby and lets someone assist you in cashing money they rightfully owe. I took the checks from the teller and walked out. But before I left I stopped to ask one suit what the deal was.

“So, this check has your institutions name on it?”
“Yes”
“And the check has my name on it?”
“Yes.”
“So you can give me my money?”
“Well yes, if you were to open an account, but there is a 5 dollar fee for non-customers.”
“Why?”
“Well Wells Fargo wants to increase our client base.”
“That’s extortion.”
“Well no, Sir, I would not call it that.”
“Really, what is your definition of extortion?”
“Forcing someone to do something against their will.”
“That is not the definition of Extortion.”
“Well, you asked for my definition.”
“Is English your first language?”

Something about his definition seemed a tad weak willed and I did a fully inclusive 5 second Google research when I got home and found that the actual definition of extortion is ” Extortion (n) Illegal use of one’s official position or powers to obtain property, funds, or patronage.” There is a difference between the dictionary definition, and the Wells Fargo representative definition.

Of the two definitions, one barely implicates Wells Fargo while the second almost asks for a Wells Fagro logo to accompany the definition.

Now, I know that the amount is only 5 dollars, however, as my grandfather has told me one too many times, “it’s never the price, but the principal.” In the same vein, I say to the banking institutions this is not the price, but the principal. You should not be able to charge customers imaginary fees and I will no longer use any bank that has to reduce themselves to extorting customers.

A fact that hit me hard in the face, when, on my way home, I entered Bank of America. I gave them a check and told them that I was not a customer. The retort was that there would be a 5 dollar fee.

All the bastards are the same and something has to be done. This is still America and America’s framers never intended to have a banking system that oppresses the people. That is why we started killing red coats. Has the time come when we should start killing Brooks Brother suits?